JUSTIN HAWKINS vocals, guitar, synthesizer

Birthday: 17 March

Favourite The Darkness Song: ‘Friday Night’

Favourite The Darkness Gig: The Monarch, Camden Town (6 February 2002, first time wearing furry trousers!)

3 Desert Island Discs: AC/DC – Powerage, Aerosmith – Pump, Queen – Jazz

Additional Information: The Darkness’ vocalist Justin Hawkins became an amphibian midwife during an educational visit to the Norfolk Broads. Whilst urinating behind some bushes, a spherical object fell from a leaf and rested on the shaft of his man-member. To his horror, the object wobbled before what appeared to be a frog-like creature with a long tail hatched from within it. The reptile accepted Justin as her mother, and denied the Hawkins’ family’s attempts to introduce her to the wild. The scaly infant would look at Justin and exclaim “You are the one that I want.” Probably because he had ‘DELIVERED THE NEWT ON JOHN’.

Quote: “Dancing is the vertical expression of a horizontal desire legalised by music.” (George Bernard Shaw)